Ice Phoenix
Chapter 39 - Identity

While Mikin was dazzling Master Kuldor with his intellect, Terrana was in her room at school, waiting to be evacuated. She stood staring at the reflection of her desk in the window. She saw her tablet, pencils, and erasers — items every normal student would have. But there were no photographs of teen throbs, scribbled love notes, or photographs of her family. The desk flaunted its bareness for her and the world to see.

Beyond the window, a school of large rays swam up from the floor and past her ceiling. Kazu was cuddled up against her chest, nestling in her left arm like a baby. Towards the front of her room, three people hovered uncomfortably, ordered to keep an eye on her. Headmistress Marl, Master Drummik, and Master Raimus had just returned with her from the infirmary, and now that she was all washed and clean, she was supposed to succumb to the call of sleep like a good little girl. She shuddered and forced herself to take a deep breath. She told herself that she would maintain control.

She walked over to the centre of her room and spun once on a certain spot. A virtual walk-in closet appeared around her and clothes descended from the ceiling, neatly hung or folded away. She rummaged through blouses, sweaters, and pants throwing most of them onto the floor. Master Drummik, Headmistress Marl, and Raimus watched, puzzled by her behaviour.

Terrana was searching for something, anything that would have reminded her of home. She knew full well that nothing, not a single piece of clothing or item had been retrieved from Fiji — from her little yellow house where she had lived with her parents and brother, but it didn’t stop her from wishing for a miracle. She didn’t even have a photograph of her loved ones, and all of a sudden, she couldn’t remember their faces.

Frustration built like a volcano in her, and her hand automatically reached to her chest to hold her pearl, hoping its familiarity would soothe her. But she felt only bare skin — she no longer had the pearl. The Ancients in Olden Kartath had removed it and given it to the grandmaster so that he could use it to locate the demons. How could they? How could they take the only thing she had left of her world? How could they have taken everything away from her?

Terrana began to shake. Unable to contain her emotions any longer, she screamed. And screamed. Her clothes went flying as she pulled everything down from the racks.

“Terrana!” Headmistress Marl dragged her from the closet. “Calm down.”

Terrana snarled and wriggled out of her grasp, backing towards the window.

“Don’t touch me! Don’t you dare touch me!”

Headmistress Marl stepped back. She had overseen many unruly and upset children of all races and ages, but for some reason, she was unsure of how to deal with Terrana. Perhaps it was because of her grief or even guilt, for allowing Terrana to escape from the school, ultimately leading to Baneyon’s distraction and his death. And to confound matters, it had been Terrana who had killed the queen. Headmistress Marl felt that if she had kept a better eye on Terrana, the girl would not have escaped to a world of death and misery. She could still have been protected.

The two of them faced each other, unable to say anything more. Kazu meowed his displeasure at all the noise and began to bury his snout into Terrana’s armpit before promptly falling asleep again.

Master Drummik walked up to her. “Terrana,” he said gently.

“Stay away!” she warned.

Master Drummik stopped where he was. “Terrana, we know this has been hard for you. Believe us when we say we are worried for you. We care for you and we want you to know you don’t have to suffer all this pain by yourself.”

“Then make it go away. Make it so I can’t remember anything. Take me back home! I don’t belong here.”

Master Drummik’s face fell. “Terrana, you know I can’t do that.”

Terrana stared up at him, her face dark. “Yes, you can. You can make me forget that I’m a murderer. You can make me forget that I’m someone like the Dream Walker. I’m not you see, I’m flesh and blood.” She looked like a little girl, lost and in pain. It hurt Drummik’s heart. Terrana raised her free hand, staring at it.

“The blood of my parents — not Dartkala — runs through me. I can prove it too. Just take me back home, back to my parents’ graves. We can take a blood analysis and I can prove my identity.”

“Terrana!”

Lorn stormed into the room and went up to her. She backed away. She couldn’t look at him. He had seen her become a monster.

“Stay away!”

But he didn’t. Instead, he pulled her into his arms and held her tight. With her face against his chest, she again felt warm and safe. She didn’t try to pull away.

“You are Terrana. You are Terrana from Sector Thirteen and you are Fijian to the bone. Don’t let anyone tell you anything different. You just happen to have this crazy power in you that you can’t control, that’s all. You don’t have to cry or beg. No one blames you for Baneyon’s or the queen’s death. You just ... you just need to sleep for a while.”

He had been standing outside, listening to everything she did and said. He knew she was filled with pain, and the confusion inside her must have been ripping her apart. When she had started to plead, it had been too much for him to bear, and he had run in.

Kazu meowed his displeasure, a very cat-like, annoyed look on his face. It was clear he was contemplating whether or not to swipe at Lorn for disturbing his sleep.

Terrana clung to Lorn, her tears soaking into the front of his shirt. “Tell me I’m in a bad nightmare, Lorn.”

"We are in a bad nightmare, Terrana. And it’s not going to get any better if we don’t get some rest. We have an evacuation tomorrow, remember? Bagruth, Bindal, and Mikin will be there. They wouldn’t want to see you all sad and miserable — you’d just worry them.”

Terrana nodded. She felt really tired all of a sudden. “Will you stay with me?”

Lorn glanced at the teachers. They both nodded.

“Yeah, sure. I’ll take your flying chair over there.”

He walked her a few steps to the bed and pulled the covers back. She climbed in, still supporting Kazu. She was asleep before he had even pulled the covers over her.

Master Drummik walked up to him and patted him on the shoulder. “Good job,” he whispered. “We’ll be outside if you need us.”

Lorn nodded. The teachers left and Lorn walked over to the chair by Terrana’s desk. He gave it a light squeeze and it pulled out into a small bed. He climbed into it, and it gently levitated off the floor. He was still staring at Terrana when sleep claimed him.

For a few hours they slept undisturbed, while the teachers guarded the door. There was even a leviathan sentry posted out in the lake, and it occasionally patrolled past their window. When he looked in, he saw a peaceful scene; a tiny kitten and a young girl curled up on the bed.

Terrana.

Terrana murmured and turned over. Kazu pawed at her cheek, watching her curiously. Instinctively, her hand moved to protect her face and Kazu pounced on it. He began licking it.

Terrana. Wake up. Terrana groaned and rolled over.

Wake up, you log. This time she opened her eyes.

Did you sleep good?

Terrana rubbed her eyes sleepily, not sure if she was awake or dreaming. She glanced around the room and spotted Lorn asleep on her chair. She had to have been dreaming.

Don’t leave me alone again. I get sad.

Terrana’s eyes widened. She had never heard the voice in her head before, and yet, it sounded familiar. She glanced down at the purring Kazu.

Kazu? Kazu’s eyes began to glow.

Kazu has no family but you. Don’t leave Kazu.

Oh my god. You, you’re talking in my head!

Kazu can talk but it was very hard to talk to you before. Only the big dumb lizard understood me.

But, how is this possible?

Kazu can talk. One day, Kazu will speak many languages, but it will take time. Right now, Kazu can only talk with dumb lizard and you. This is the first time Kazu has managed to reach you, but Kazu must be honest — you have the brain cells of a dead fish.

Terrana was stunned. Was it possible that Kazu was feiyed? Only feiyed animals could mindspeak, such as the prince’s faar. She too was supposedly feiyed, but she couldn’t mindspeak ... until now.

Kazu, do you know what feiyed means?

Yes. It’s people speech for me, you, and porcupine face.

P, porcupine face?

Silly flying dog-horse with needles and doll.

You mean Dragoth! Prince Gil Ra Im’s faar!

Yes. Porcupine face. Prince is the doll.

Terrana briefly wondered how Dragoth would react to being described as porcupine face. Probably not very well, but then looking at Kazu, she got the impression that her ‘kitten’ could not care less. There was a look of smugness and arrogance about him, but she wondered if that wasn’t his natural disposition of being a feline.

Kazu … it was a cautious approach. How did you know that I’d be able to speak with you?

He cocked his head at her, his eyes glowing in the dark.

Because Kazu and Terrana are family. Kazu and Terrana have always been together, since we were both eggs.

She almost sent Kazu flying; her heart was beating so fast. Beads of sweat appeared on her forehead.

I’m not, I was never an egg! What are you talking about? Who are you?

I am me, I am Kazu and I am your kin. But Terrana does not remember who she is.

I am human! I was born to human parents! I was never an egg!

Technically, you were two eggs. You were an egg in your human mother’s womb, but before that you were Dartkala’s egg. But you were born into that world, to the humans who raised you. Kazu was born after, but I am pure. Terrana is mixed — that is why she can’t remember.

Mixed? How am I mixed?

Your egg broke. It was a flat statement.

How?

Kazu maybe god, but he’s a baby god. He doesn’t know everything. He ignored Terrana’s scathing look.

You’re arrogant.

Godliness is often misunderstood. Sometimes I think your egg broke on your head.

Terrana bit back a retort. Oddly enough, Kazu reminded her of Archie. They both shared the same smug, I-love-myself attitude and penchant for derisive comments aimed mainly at her, although she suspected that Kazu targeted a broader audience. But it ran deeper than that — she should have been shocked, shaken that her pet had just spoken to her, telling her bluntly that she was feiyed like him, but she wasn’t. Whereas it had been difficult to accept the truth from the Ancients in Si Ren Da, it was easier coming from Kazu. There was a bond between them, it had been there ever since she had first laid eyes on him, and Terrana finally realised what it was — Kazu wasn’t her pet. He was a little sibling that she had to protect. He was family.

A little bit of the old Terrana returned, and a sly look crept into her eyes.

If you’re going to insult me, why don’t you just spend the night with your best buddy, Niku?

Kazu flicked his tail. Hmmph. Slave. Big, dumb sorryass is slave to Kazu’s undeniable godliness!

Yep, he definitely reminded her of Archie.

So, if you’re a little god, how old are you? Sᴇaʀᴄh thᴇ Find_Nøvel.ɴet website on Gøøglᴇ to access chapters of novels early and in the highest quality.

Kazu is younger than Terrana. You were first.

How do you know?

Because you were there when I came. You were sleeping first, but then something happened and your egg broke when it shouldn’t have. You left and Kazu was alone for a long time. And then one day you returned and Kazu felt you. Kazu was born.

What do you mean, I came back?

Terrana came into Dartkala on ship and Kazu felt her. Then Kazu was born, and you brought me to this school.

It was starting to make sense to Terrana now. Kazu had appeared to her as a kitten aboard Dartkala’s Arrow, the very same time the ice-phoenixes had shown themselves. Their words returned to her.

Two young ones in the void. The ice-phoenixes had been referring to her and Kazu. They had known!

Are you an ice-phoenix?

Do I look like my food? Kazu is much greater!

So what are you?

I’ll tell you when I find out. Just so you know, I can’t wait either!

Am I the same as you?

Greatness can’t be shared, fortunately.

Terrana rolled her eyes. So you’re saying we’re family, but we’re not the same?

Yes.

So what am I?

I think you could be ... a retard.

There was a loud yowl and Lorn woke up with a start to find a hissing Kazu on his stomach.

“What the —? Kazu?”

Go back to sleep, lover boy.

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