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Chapter 8: Tsap Eht (The Past)

Beta’s footsteps in the mostly empty hallway felt unwanted. He let them fall anyway; hugging his bare arms as a comfort more so than a chill.

The Perna went door to door, slowing to look at the numbers, realizing it wasn’t the right number, and moving on. Normal dead couldn’t have seen so well in the blackness under the best circumstances, but how Beta was created made him an exception.

Always the exception.

181.

181.

181.

And there it was. Beta stopped outside Room 181, afraid to move. He felt as if this was it—even though it wasn’t—and if he did this there was no going back to forcing himself to forget.

But he also knew if he didn’t do it, everything that had happened so far would just happen again.

Beta didn’t even touch the doorknob, he just leaned his head down and took a step. Once his foot reached the door frame…

….it went straight through. There was no shimmer or glow, it was just as if there was nothing there to begin with.

Beta emerged on the other side of the door, looking around and realizing that it was basically identical to his own room…except for the person sleeping in its beds. Beta rushed over, being careful not to wake up Hershey’s neighbor in the process. He went over to the Nat’s bed and, violently, shook his shoulder. It didn’t take much to stir the dead, as they were always on the edge of sleep.

Hershey stirred and opened his eyes, squinting at Beta. He blinked once, then four times all within a second. “Be—?”

Beta covered his mouth with his hand, putting a finger to his lips. Once he was sure Hershey would be silent, he took his hand away and gestured for him to follow. Hershey pushed the covers off of himself and put on the shirt abandoned on the ground. “What’s—?” Hershey tried to speak again but, once more, Beta shushed him. Hershey tried to put on his shoes but Beta wouldn’t let him, grabbing his hand and tugging him toward the door.

“Beta it’s—”

The newcomer grabbed the doorknob and turned it all the way, shocking Hershey when it clicked and then creaked opened. “…locked.”

“Come on,” Beta whispered, still holding Hershey’s wrist as he led him down the hallway. Hershey jumped as the door shut to his room. He hopped more than walked down the hallway; it was too dark for him to see the ground and he didn’t trust it, especially with the lack of shoes.

“Beta what’s going on?” Hershey asked now, a little louder since they were a wall away from the rest of them.

“You’ll see,” Beta said, the tone in his voice sounding panicked. Hershey wanted to stop and ask questions, but when people say ‘You’ll see’ they usually mean it.

Beta’s grip tightened as a bright light invaded their darkness. He stopped walking, causing Hershey to bump into his back as he squinted at the light. The two could only assume it was one of the night guards.

“What’re you two doing out of your roo—Agh!”

Hershey tore his hand away from Beta when he heard the sudden cry, trying so hard to see past the blinding light.

The light, after having a quick spaz, landed on the floor. Hershey looked down at it, irritated at first but then surprised to see the guard on the ground with her mouth hanging ajar.

Beta picked up the flashlight, coating her body in darkness, and pointed it ahead. “We should carry on,” Beta said, walking forward. He stopped and turned around when he sensed Hershey wasn’t following. “Come on.”

“Beta what the hell did you do to her?” Hershey breathed out, his feet glued to the ground.

Beta sighed, rolling his eyes. “I’ll explain later but you need to trust me right now!” he hissed.

Run, his head said. If you use your powers maybe you could... Hershey couldn’t help but stare into Beta’s eyes at that moment. He could see nothing but shadow around it, but somehow the brightness of that red burned a fire in Hershey’s stoic heart. The truth was he didn’t want to leave, he wanted to go.

Hershey rushed after him.

Arriving at their room, Beta opened the door—again with ease—and the Nat was relieved to see not only light but his only friend pacing back and forth in the room with a nearly comedic case of bed hair.

“Oh thank God,” Hershey let out, happy to see his friend. Beta shut the door behind him. “Okay now I feel a lot better about this.”

Matrix sat on his bed and held his hands out, shrugging. “Okay, Hershey’s here. Now do you want to explain what the hell is going on?”

Beta looked from Hershey to Matrix slowly, sitting on his own bed hastily. He clenched his hands, biting his lip as he tried to figure out how to start.

He leaned forward, the back of his head shouting at him not to do it. He did it anyway, grabbing the bottom of his shirt and lifting it up over his head, revealing his full torso. But that’s not what surprised them, it was the red marking that almost seemed burned into the skin right above his hip bone.

Matrix pointed at the marking shaped like an octagon with a drop of rain inside. “What is that?”

“This,” Beta gestured to his stomach. “Is a birthmark, the marking of a Perna.”

“You got it when you arrived on Plato?” Hershey asked, leaning down to get a better look.

Beta shook his head. “No, I got it when I was born.”

Matrix and Hershey gave each other a quick look before turning back to Beta. “We didn’t get marks when we were born,” Hershey said, leaning back up.

“Yes, that is because you are extremely unimportant.” Realizing how that came across, he added, “No offense.”

“I’m sorry, why does a birthmark warrant a sleep-depriving, illegal, late night chat?” Matrix asked, waving his arms tirelessly.

“Good question,” Beta replied, throwing his shirt back on, messing up his hair. He smoothed it out as he spoke. “I am not who you think I am,” he started off. “I’m not a free spirit like the rest of you, I take order from one supreme power; the creator of all; the thing that lives within and around all of us…Nature.”

Beta could see the tension release in the two boys’ shoulder as he said it. “What like the trees talk to you?” Matrix said, openly sarcastic.

Beta shrugged. “Sure, if it comforts you to think like that. We were born human, but the knowledge we had and the voices we heard—not to mention the power—separated us from your species. It was our mission as Pernas to die and be reborn with the gift of power and purpose, part of that purpose being to handle the new problems that arose with the humans…this includes the Syncs. Coming to Plato wasn’t for us Pernas, it was supposed to be a straight shot from Earth and back again.”

“Aren’t…Syncs those creatures they found on Earth like years ago? The ones that evolved from humans?”

Matrix whipped his head toward Hershey, his expression tightening. “How do you know about that?”

Hershey turned to him, squinting at Matrix’s incompetence. “What? You can use me but I can’t use you?” The Nat turned back to Beta, gesturing for him to go on. He did.

“We weren’t tied to death by Sync, we were tied to death by whatever plagued the human race at the time. Maybe it was World Wars, or a plague, or maybe the AIDS crisis. Pernas come in many different shapes and sizes, I’m just the more common one.” Beta took a quick pause. “Truth is, the Plato before Lucienne had Ciders and Pernas as well, just not as blatantly different. Staks, Tenties, Nats; you’re all just fillers in a new afterlife full of confusion and corruption.” Matrix rolled his eyes and Beta added, “No offense.” He sighed and looked down, taking a long pause before going on. It wasn’t for drama, but because he wasn’t sure how to start the next part.

“I did something…something awful.” He looked up at them. “I can’t tell you what it was…I don’t want to relive it. But…that’s what got me sent here in the first place. Being here, and don’t take this the wrong way, is a punishment for what I’ve done.”

Beta stood up slowly, looking straight at Hershey. “No one understands me, and I’m afraid no one ever will if I don’t do this.”

“Do what?” Matrix said, the riddles spun starting to get tiresome. Sᴇaʀch Thᴇ FɪndNøvel.ɴᴇt website on Gøøglᴇ to access chapters of novels early and in the highest quality.

Beta turned to him now. “Tell you everything.” His shoulders slumped. “I lied about Julia.”

Matrix stood up then and unfolded his arms. “What?”

“What?” Hershey added, confused on the topic. “Julia Hill the Nat?”

“Yes, the Julia Hill that Beta sent to her rather ‘permanent end.’” Matrix glared at him, and Hershey joined in. “Why Beta?”

“It wasn’t on purpose!” he exclaimed defensively. “I know you won’t believe me but it’s not something I can just control. I was born a Perna and sometimes our kind have trouble acting on our own. Our loyalties are scattered, our ‘empathy’ is always running low, and our judgement is quite poor without something or someone guiding us! I never wanted Julia to die, I even tried to warn her—”

“Yeah well your warning led to her coming up to one of the higher-ups and directly asking them about the Syncs so kudos to you,” Matrix interrupted.

Beta turned to him and didn’t say a word. Matrix thought the look was hostile and was ready to defend himself when it turned soft. “Her death opened up my eyes…it brought a rather ‘extravagant’ power back to me…and with that came all my memories. Most of them aren’t good but…knowing them has definitely put things in perspective.” Beta swallowed the bile building up in his throat. “I don’t know what else to do…I never know what else to do.”

Beta’s jaw clenched and so did his hands, trying to give himself armor since the walls in his mind had already come crashing down. “I don’t trust you…but I really want to.” Beta let that statement resonate, and Hershey and Matrix couldn’t help but steal a glance at the other, curious how they were thinking about the whole situation.

Matrix gave Hershey a look of doubt, and in return Hershey gave him a look of faith. Matrix’s eyebrows went up, surprised that Hershey was so okay with it.

Seeing that Matrix was still very unsure, Hershey took a step toward Beta. “Nature sent you up here?” Hershey asked. Beta just nodded. Hershey nodded back. “So I guess whatever you did must’ve been really bad.” Hershey saw Beta’s nostril flare when he said it, but nodded anyway. Hershey nodded again as if he understood. With a slight jump from Beta, Hershey reached his hand out. “I’m sure Matrix’s done worse.”

Beta allowed himself to smile, grabbing Hershey’s arm in a welcoming manor. The two turned to Matrix who was still “being unsure” in the corner. Rolling his eyes, he walked over to them and stopped right in front of Beta. “Your secret’s safe with me.”

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