Our Overtime: Ice League Book 1 (The Ice League Series)
Our Overtime: Chapter 20

I would’ve been moving to Texas with him around this time.

But he wanted nothing to do with me.

And honestly, I wanted nothing to do with life anymore.

It was amazing to think of how things could go so well just to turn so ugly.

I stared at the new walls around me. My chosen prison. It’s not like my grandparents forced me to stay here or anything. I just had no desire to get up and move. Life had just turned completely upside down on me. I figured my life would be set at this point- moving in with Greys, getting a job I loved… Instead, I had nothing.

I guess I deserved what I was going through. I’d had it so wonderful with Greys for six years while most of the other girls in my grade were single. But now I’d be single forever because I would never give my heart to someone like that again.

I hated him. I was disgusted by him.

But…

Deep down….

I would take him back in a second if he would only ask to be forgiven. The thought of a phone call brought tears to my eyes. I wanted it so badly. Only, I hadn’t heard from him since that text.

I’d woken up in the hospital alone.

My grandparents showed up a couple of hours later. They were on a business trip. That was jarring in and of itself- while their only granddaughter was lying in a hospital bed, they decided it would be okay to go on with business.

While I waited for them, I begged the nurse to let me see Grey, but she had no idea who I was talking about.

Surely he’d come and try to see me. He loved me and I was in the hospital.

A doctor came in and asked me how I was feeling and if I remembered what had happened to me.

It dawned on me then that I didn’t. I had no recollection of what had happened that landed me in the hospital. But I knew that Grey would want to know where I was. He’d probably feel bad that he wasn’t here with me. He was probably worried he hadn’t heard from me… in…I don’t even know how long… I didn’t know how long I’d been here… I tried to calm my breathing…

Maybe he didn’t know that I was even in the hospital?

I asked the nurse for my phone but she just shrugged and said I wasn’t admitted with one.

That was odd too. It was always on me.

When my grandparents came into the room, I immediately asked them about Grey, but they ignored my questions and talked over me.

“My phone,” I said loudly to break through their discussion.

My grandfather gave me an exasperated look, “what about it, Julianna?”

I cleared my throat, “I need one please. Mine’s gone.”

My grandfather then lifted his phone to his ear and barked into it for someone to get me a phone as he walked out of the door.

That was the last I’d seen of him in the hospital.

The new phone was lying next to me when I awoke the next morning.

A lot of my info had already been transferred to this one, which made things easier.

I quickly noticed unread messages from Grey and that immediately put me at ease.

Until I read them.

Nothing could have prepared me…

Jules, I am sorry to say this, but we are not good for each other. I cannot be with you anymore. I’m just holding you down and I’m going to get really busy this year with hockey. I hope you are well, and I wish you the best.

I’m so sorry for what happened. You deserve better. I can’t get past knowing what I did to you.

Like… what the hell? It didn’t even sound like him. And what he ‘did to me’? Made me love him? What was he even talking about? He always texted that he loved me and he never once took the time to capitalize I’s in his texts. And now not even a goodbye or anything. I thought it was a joke at first, but I’d texted and called him like crazy since I read it and I’d received nothing back. I was so in shock I think I was actually numb and not really believing it. I figured, okay, maybe he got scared or something and moving in was too fast for him and he’d call me in a couple of days… but the call never came.

Instead, I’d only received one more text that read: “You need to stop. This is over.”

I felt like I’d been slapped across the face.

And that just brought rage.

He was trying to make it look like I was crazy? He was the one who had just asked me to move in with him and now he was breaking up with me over text messages. Of course I was going crazy. Who wouldn’t? I didn’t even know what to make of that.

So, I tried Paige. But nothing, the calls weren’t even being answered. I figured she couldn’t face it to tell me that Greyson was done with me. I couldn’t blame her. I wouldn’t want to be the one to tell her if Max ever decided he didn’t want her anymore. And maybe she’d turned on me as well…

So, my everyday turned into tears. I cried for him. Cried for me. Cried over stupid shit we’d done or said. We’d been together for so long that everything had a memory attached to him.

How do you go from talking to someone every day and from them being your center to having them just gone?

Every morning I hoped to see a stupid goofy good morning text from him like usual, but it never came. He had texted me good morning for the past six years… and that was something I missed the most. How pathetic was I?

Everything changed when I was in that stupid hospital bed. The life I thought I was going to have had been ripped away from me and what replaced it was a weird fog of a life that I didn’t want.

My grandparents arranged for me to move into our cottage in the Hamptons where they’d be for the rest of the summer, so they could supposedly “look after me as I recovered.”

I hated the loneliness of the Hamptons. I’d only ever gone for a week at a time in the past because I was usually training all summer and because Greyson was never allowed to come with me. I had no excuse to avoid it anymore. But I had to face it: I had no plans or job. The Hamptons with my grandparents was my only choice.

I locked myself in my designated room all July, not even bothering to finish job applications or even step onto the ice to fulfill coaching commitments that I’d previously signed on for. I couldn’t do it. Everything reminded me of him and of what I’d lost- my whole life with him. I wanted to marry him and have babies with him and have every night and every morning with him. And now I had nothing. I was lost in a void that didn’t make any sense.

I knew in the back of my mind I’d never love anyone else.

It was a hopeless mantra I repeated all day, every day. I couldn’t give my heart to anyone else. My heart was with him, and I needed to accept that.

I told myself I needed to stop being pathetic and to embrace hatred for him. He didn’t even fight for us. He just killed everything we had. But I couldn’t get over it. I couldn’t seem to accept that as an answer.

My love and hate for him were becoming intertwined. I couldn’t get past the fact that I was strong before he came along. Maybe not happy, but independent. He was the one that interjected himself into my life. Why do that if you knew you’d be leaving?

I thought I had hit my lowest; I really, truly did.

But then came my grandparents fucking Labor Day party and things went from bad to way way worse.

_ _ _ _

“Honey, you look lovely!” My grandmother crooned. Gag. She hadn’t asked me once in the past month if I was okay. I was just a pain to her.

“And this, Kevin, is my granddaughter, Julianna,” my granddad proudly said to a tall stranger. “Kevin is a promising guy in the office,” he said with a wink.

Kevin leaned forward from behind my granddad to shake my hand and my granddad gave me a not-so-inconspicuous grin and raised his eyebrows as if to say- he’s a good prospect. It made me sick. They were foaming at the mouths at the idea of handing me off to anyone who wasn’t Greyson.

I gave a tight-lipped polite smile and shook his hand. It was easy to notice he was tall and handsome and probably around 28-30, but not my type at all. He had the slicked back hair and grin that said, ‘I know I’m good looking,’ topped off with all the high-end brand clothes and a huge ass watch that screamed money man. I’d been around this type of guy my whole life. The kind my granddad liked. Everything that Greyson was not.

But I couldn’t help but think, how easy it would be- to date someone and it not being a fight every time their name was mentioned. To not feel tense and afraid of what both parties would say whenever a holiday or family event came up.

But he was no Grey. Grey’s eyes danced excitedly and mischievously, like he was always one fun step ahead of you; like he had some great surprise in store just for you. Kevin’s eyes were practically black and flat, and his smile was fake, and his hand was meaty and gross- definitely not that of a skilled athlete. Sᴇaʀᴄh thᴇ Findɴovel.ɴet website on Gøøglᴇ to access chapters of novels early and in the highest quality.

“Would you like a drink?” He asked with a sly smile, while looking me up and down.

Fuck it. He was probably a harmless business snooze.

“I’d love about five,” I said dryly. My grandparents laughed like I was being funny. Eat your hearts out, I thought, and I let Kevin lead me away to the bar.

That was my first mistake. But I didn’t keep count, considering I did have about five drinks.

With Grey, I loved to be tipsy. He’d be so sweet, letting me lean on him and he’d brushing his hands through my hair. He’d lean down and kiss my head every couple of minutes, and I couldn’t wait to get back to his bed and cuddle with him.

But maybe that was what being young and in love was like- exciting and safe and fun. Feeling jittery at the prospect of getting to spend the night together. Loving looking at him and brushing my thumb under his eye. Feeling so lucky to be together.

Maybe because I wasn’t so young anymore, I’d never have it that way again. I’d never feel so absolutely loved and free.

Maybe our love had only been fueled by innocence. We experienced all our firsts together: loving, drinking, sex, it was all exciting. Maybe it would’ve been exciting to experience all of that with anyone?

Or maybe that was how the world worked. The people who got lucky were the ones who stayed with their first love. They were able to keep that innocent and pure kind of love that made you blind to all faults. They felt that happy drunk on life young euphoria with that special first love and were able to keep it. Did everyone else just pick someone and decide to settle with them and all their “love” was just a lie?

That thought made me want to drink even more. I figured if I was drunk enough, maybe I wouldn’t be so sad, and maybe I wouldn’t care that my new place would be next to a guy like this instead of Greyson.

Kevin led me around the party proudly. I nodded and smiled when I had to.

He knew exactly what to say to everyone. No coaching needed. No making side jokes at the rest of the party’s expense. He was a mingling pro. I didn’t open my mouth once and I think he preferred it that way.

He kept giving me sly smiles and looking down my dress. Whatever. It was easier to get drunk with him than with my grandparents. I tried to make it okay in my head. He wasn’t bad looking. He had a good job.

But then he leaned to whisper in my ear, “Want to get out of here?”

Did I? Yes. Did I want to leave with him specifically? No. Did I enjoy his breath on my ear? Definitely not.

I looked for my grandparents then. They were fake laughing with a bunch of other preppishly dressed old-timers. They didn’t even care to look for me. No one cared about me anymore.

I couldn’t help but think about the fact that my grandparents didn’t want me with Grey, when he always looked out for me and everything we did was always safe… how would they feel about me going all out with Kevin?

I looked back at Kevin and nodded.

I needed to force myself into the next season of my life.

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