The Bastard Queen (Viciously Yours #2)
Chapter Fifty: The Surrending

Our exit from the O’Neil Estate went smoothly, the three of us slipped easily past the guards before they caught sight of the white flames starting to consume the building. After the initial ask of what happened from the others, we continued onto the next Estate in complete silence. It seemed the dark mood that clung to us caused the others to keep quiet despite not experiencing it first hand. Though anytime a Surrendering Rite was mentioned even the joyous of Fae became lost in their own self reflection.

However, I was more willing to believe that it was the aggression wafting off Baris that stopped the others from speaking. The tension he created was one-sided at the moment but if he continued to glare at me it wouldn’t stay that way for long. I knew from his interruption during my conversation with Imogen that he hadn’t agreed with how everything happened. But it wasn’t his place to cast judgement or an opinion during a Surrendering, that belonged to the participant and the Divines alone. Even thinking about his attitude caused a surge of irritation to roll over me.

One step after the other, we marched deeper into the woods towards the mysterious O Cathasaigh Estate. Traveling this close to the castle was ill-advised since I was almost certain that Mab had a way to monitor traveling activity. So I made the decision for us to continue on foot after a quick stop at a tavern for food and water that Erick currently held. It would take us a few hours to reach the Estate which we estimated would be around sunrise. Not the best timing since patrols almost tripled during the day throughout the Kingdom but I focused on the positives instead.

The positives being that depending on how those letters proving Tidhg’s disloyalty affected Mab, my mate would be coming home safe and sound a lot sooner than expected. If Mab took out around thirty thousand of her own soldiers driven by her need to punish those who dared to go against her, it would severely cripple her hold over the Unseelie. The younger generation’s belief in Mab’s ‘for the people’ act would be shaken, the older generation tired of her unforgiving ways would start pushing back, the ones that wanted Tidhg on the throne would rebel at the news of his death, and thirty thousand families would crave vengeance for their lost loved ones. She would unintentionally tigger the self-destruction of her own kingdom while driving her people towards me as the lesser of two evils. Because at the end of the day the majority of the Unseelie, who were force fed lies distributed by Mab, still thought I was a greedy, power hungry, bitch.

And I couldn’t even begin to unravel the irony of how she painted me out to be the villain by basically describing me as her younger self, I thought with an intense eye roll. She had to have some bad karma headed her way on a level of cosmic portions for that alone.

Though my thinking was optimistic, there was still a chance that Mab wouldn’t act on her paranoia. It was a slim, very slim chance but still a chance. It also brought up another possibility, what if Tidhg won? What if he managed to outsmart Mab and take the Unseelie thrown? It would put every Unseelies’ loyalty into question. Sure the traditionalists might side with me because I was the first born and the religious because I was a Divine but the others? It would throw everything up into the air in a decidedly unfun way. But the letters still needed to be brought to her attention.

Without the O’Neil’s manpower we didn’t have enough soldiers to match Oberons which was a condition in order to receive his support. And I was under no illusions that without his army, we’d fall. Even if I used my God abilities to the point of burning myself out, all it would take was a well placed iron arrow to bring me down. I couldn’t allow us to rely solely on myself because if I went down the others wouldn’t stand a chance. We needed Oberon’s army and to get it we needed more soldiers but I had a growing unease that we weren’t going to get that from the O Cathasaigh’s Estate.

So how could we get more soldiers? Groups of my soldiers that weren’t training or protecting areas vulnerable to attack, were out recruiting. Everyday dozens of Faekind poured into our camp sent in by Banshees, Trolls or Fae. Lamias slithered in cautiously, Banshees walked in looking thrilled, Kelpies trotted into the lake looking at home, Pixie’s buzzed around excitedly, Brownies shuffled in with bright smiles, and Nymphs filled the air with lust. The most surprising however were the Dwarfs, Gnomes, and Goblins that came stomping into camp with distrustful sneers. Apparently Fitzgerald “Grumpy” Ó Maoilriain had spread the word that while I was a bitch with sticky fingers, I was not as big of a bitch as Mab. And somehow that was enough to have all the smaller, angrier Faekind banging on my door to be let into the army.

I can only assume his sticky finger comment was from the time I took materials without asking to make Cillian’s battle axes. So at least I knew why they looked so distrustful coming in, the little fuckers thought I was going to steal their shit. Snorting in amusement, I shook my head, I was going to give that Dwarf so much shit. Like an astronomical amount of shit.

“My Queen?”

Pausing mid-step, I twisted at the waist to look over my shoulder, “Yes?”

“We only have a few hours left until we reach the Estate, perhaps we should stop and rest for a few?”

Giving Erick a nod, the members of our small group began to spread out and take seats around the trees. Walking from one soldier to the next, Erick passed out the turnip sandwiches and filled cups of water for everyone. Satisfied with their actions, I continued my stride for a few seconds until I was directly underneath a thick tree branch. Jumping, I quickly pulled myself up and straddled the branch so that I could lean my back against the trunk. Taking the food and drink that Erick offered me, I nibbled on the sandwich and kicked my legs while watching our surroundings.

The soldiers murmured to each other as they ate, creating a sense of comradery in the otherwise silent forest. Flashing smiles at one another, they shared humorous personal stories that caused their fellow soldiers to muffle their laughter. Hands rose to emphasize actions or movements as their voices changed in pitch to dramatize the memory. The mood that had been weighing on us seemed to have lifted as they celebrated their lives by sharing stories. Smiling down at them, I listened to their antics and like them ignored the last source of tension stemming from the edge of our little campground.

“I swear, we must have used all the water and soap in the house but he still smelled like Kelpie shit!” Lieutenant Patrick laughed, white teeth blinking in the fading night. “It was so bad that I had to tell my mate I loved him but there was absolutely no way he was sleeping in the house until that smell was gone.”

“What did he say?” Twyla urged him on, choking back a chuckle.

Dark purple hair streak through with bright blue shook as Patrick grinned, “He told me if I loved him, I’d let him sleep in the bed with me. So I told him if he wanted our sex life to survive he wouldn’t go anywhere near the bed smelling like that...Poor thing slept in the barn for a week.”

“Divines! That’s gold!” Another soldier barked, smothering his own laughter.

A round of quiet laughter sparked throughout the troop drawing a small laugh from my lips as I looked at the group with growing affection. An internal warmth flooded my chest caused by the Fae around me and I knew I’d do whatever it took to make sure they all went back to their loved ones at the end of this war. Come hell or high water, I’d figure out a way to match Oberon’s army in numbers. It wasn’t a choice, it was something that needed to be done for the benefit of everyone.

“How can you all just sit here, laughing? And talking about shit that doesn’t matter?” A rough voice hissed, effectively cutting through the friendly atmosphere. “We just watched someone kill themselves for Divines sake!”

“Baris.” Bria’s voice snapped out harshly as the smiles faded from the soldier’s faces.

Pushing off the tree he had been leaning against, he shoved past his twin to stand in full view of everyone, “No, Bria. I’ve been following orders without question for two weeks, despite some questionable orders. But this is too much, our Queen just watched someone die and did nothing. Fuck, she helped! And no one’s going to say anything? Huh? No one?”

Leaves crunched as the soldiers shifted in place, uncomfortable with the heat of his eyes and the accusation that he had spoken aloud.

Swinging a leg over the branch to face them, I watched as Erick stepped rigidly towards the boy, “Private Baris, I’d advise you to watch the accusations you toss around so carelessly. At your Queen, no less. This is not the time nor the place to-”

“Fuck that.” The boy spit, his cold green eyes snapping over the General’s shoulder to me. “You helped that woman die. You didn’t try to stop her, you didn’t do anything but perform the rite. You practically encouraged her.”

“It wasn’t my place to intervene, neither was it yours.” I replied, tone devoid of emotion as I met his gaze head on.

“So what? It doesn’t matter how you get what you want as long as you get it? Do you even care that she committed suicide? Does it even phase you? Or are you that twisted up inside that a life has no meaning to-”

A sharp wind slammed him back against the nearest tree with a ‘oomph’ stealing the breath from his lungs. Shoulders tense with aggression, Bria stepped forward to loom over her twin, “Enough. Enough, Baris. You have no right to speak to your Queen like that. If she was anyone else you’d have already lost your head! How dare you even make assumptions as to what-”

“It’s okay. Let him speak, Bria.” I called out, cutting her off before she could rip into her twin further.

She turned, already shaking her head, “My Queen, I cannot allow him to-”

“You’re not. I am.” The hard tone of my voice made it clear there was no room for argument.

Lips pursed, the green haired soldier gave a clipped nod before taking a tense step away from her brother.

With the young male exposed to my view, I watched as he righted himself and took deep breaths to refill his lungs, “You asked if I cared that she committed sucide. You accused me of helping Imogen kill herself. But she didn’t commit suicide and I didn’t help her kill herself.”

“Don’t lie to me, I was there. I saw what happened.”

“What you saw was a Surrendering. Something I didn’t think you’d be naive about but that was my mistake.”

“What that was, was an assisted suicide.” He snarled, light green eyes flaring in outrage.

I shook my head in disappointment, “You’re using human terms for an inhuman situation, Baris. I understand you are young but that is no excuse to be ignorant of our rites and customs. ”

His features took on an indignant expression, “I am not ignorant. I know what the Surrendering is, it’s sucide. The Surrendering Rite is performed for Fae who feel they can’t continue to live or who no longer wish to live.”

Divines, what a small minded view of such a complex ritual.

“Who here agrees with Baris? Either about the purpose of the rite or about how I acted? Speak freely, I won’t hold anything against you.” I announced, letting the last half of my sandwich slip free from my fingers to the ground. When nothing but silence filled the air, I gave a small thrust of my hips and dropped the seven feet to the ground.

The male scoffed, “Of course, they aren’t going to-”

“Stop. You’re done speaking.” I cut him off, my voice hard and unyielding. “You are always allowed to question my orders if they don’t seem reasonable to you. General Erick has done this several times, I have no need nor do I want ‘yes men’ for soldiers. However, the way you have approached the situation is completely disrespectful and unacceptable. Obviously I have been too lenient with you to the point that you seem to forget our positions. So let me correct any misunderstandings.”

As I spoke, I had crossed the distance between us until he was forced to tip his head back to look me in the eyes. Straightening to my full six foot three stature, I could see a blue glow reflected in his as I dominated the boy with my words, “First and foremost, I am not your friend. I may joke with you, I may treat you as my equal but when I am acting in my role as Queen? You are my soldier, my subordinate. You do not obtain a rank that would ever allow you to speak to me in the manner that you just did. The orders I issue are ones with the safety and the consideration of my soldiers skills at the forefront of my mind. If you have a problem with my orders, you ask permission to speak with me privately before voicing your concerns. What you do not do, is throw a public tantrum where you accuse your monarch of cowardice and underhanded tactics because you do not understand the complexities of the situation. Think carefully about your future, Baris. Because the path you are on will find you permanently expelled from my army, do you understand?”

“I’m sorry, I-”

Pointed teeth gritted against each other before I snarled, “Do. You. Understand.”

“I understand, My Queen. I apologize for stepping out of line.” Pastel green lashes lowered followed by the bow of his head until all I could see were the short strands.

I stared down at the back of his head for a few moments to calm down the almost overwhelming sense of irritation that the boy inspired. Despite what I said, it was becoming increasingly clear that Baris did not have a future in my army. As harsh as it may sound, he was proving to be less than soldier material. He did well in the physical aspects of what being a soldier entailed but the mental qualities of it? Whether he knew it or not, Baris didn’t have it in him like Bria and Cillian did. If I had to guess, I’d say he was more like Syrus than anyone knew.

Falling back a step, I turned and spun in a slow circle to meet everyone’s eyes, “A short history lesson and then we keep moving.” Sliding my gaze back to Baris’s, I gave him an answer to his question, “We, the Fae, if we aren’t fatally wounded are immortal. Disease, complications of aging and things like heart attacks do not exist in our species. Which means that there is no natural progression towards death, this is where the Surrendering Rite comes in. The Surrendering is something that our people have been doing since the birth of our species. It’s wound in very old magick that requires the Fae undergoing the rite to be clear and sound of mind. The magick in the Rite will reject any Fae who has any hesitation, immediate regret, or distress during the Surrendering. That was that heavy feeling that pressed over the room after Imogen took her last breath, it was searching for anything other than clarity and acceptance coming off her soul. If it had found her regretting her decision, she would have been jolted back into the living.”

Seeing the understanding dawn behind the color of his eyes, I finished, “It is the closest thing our kind has to a natural death. The Surrendering is our way of bringing our lives to a natural end when we feel that our time in this life is over. It isn’t to be judged by anyone other than the Fae Surrendering and the Divines above, only they can pass judgement. Keep this in mind as the longer you live, the more Surrendering’s you’ll see.”

Figuring the impromptu history lesson was over by the chagrin look creeping across the young Grymes’s face, I turned and started towards Erick to check our timeline.

“Uh, My Queen?”

“Yes, Lieutenant?” I mused, shifting to face a very nervous looking Patrick.

Dark purple eyes looked around as if gathering moral support before asking, “I- well, we were wondering if you knew why it was called The Surrendering Rite?”

I raised a surprised brow, “You guys don’t know? Didn’t your parents or grandparents or great-grandparents ever tell you?” When no one offered up the answer, I turned to Erick, “What about you?”

“My parents told me the meaning of the name was lost.” He shrugged.

“Wow, okay. First thing I’m doing after the war is instating a mandatory culture and customs class because this is pathetic. Make a note of that, General.”

The man actually began digging around in his bag that had held the food, presumably to make the note, “Very wise, My Queen.”

“Alright, Kiddos. Story time.” Preening at the praise to my genius, I gave the soldiers a wicked grin and spoke in a haunting tone, “Once upon a time during the Wild Era, when we ate humans and made deals that caused the Gods to shiver in fear. You know, the good ole days. It was believed that we used to live forever because we fought. We fought each other, we fought the humans, we fought other supernatural creatures, it was thought that everyday we fought to live. Because honestly? Everybody fucking hated us. So when one of us decided that it was their time to go, it was seen as a Surrendering. Though, I was told the Rite used to be more fun. They used to butcher a human as a last meal sort of deal and I kind of wish we kept that part.”

Seven pairs of eyes blinked back at me until Bria broke the silence, “They used to eat humans?”

“Babes...what the fuck did you think our teeth were for?”

“But we don’t even eat meat!” Twyla exclaimed.

I shook my head in amusement, “Anymore. We don’t eat meat anymore.”

“My Queen...have you?”

“Have I what, General?” I purred, shifting my teeth into a pointy grin.

His adam apple bobbed harshly, “Have you had human before?”

Swinging my eyes over the nauseated looking group, I replied with a shrugged, “Personally, I like mine crispy.”

Groans of disgust and gagging sounds rang throughout the makeshift camp ground as I laughed maniacally.

——

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