The Luna’s Choice (Theo and Ayla) by Kat Silver -
Chapter 196
Chapter 46: Theo
I went to the apartment after getting back to the packhouse to check on Ayla. Maggie had sent me a text that she had been a bit off throughout the day. She said it didn’t seem like anything serious, just that she wasn’t in the best of moods. I understood what she was talking about as soon as I got close to the suite. I could feel her anxiety through our connection.
I walked in to see her sitting at the dining table, chewing on a fingernail as she hunched over books and papers strewn across the surface. I rested my hands on her shoulders, kneading the tense muscles with my thumbs.
“What’s wrong, baby?” I asked as I k*ssed the top of her head.
She sighed. “I think I need to quit school.”
“What?” Now I was worried. I pulled the chair out beside and sat down, turning her to look at me. “Why would you think that, Ayla? You were so excited to go to college.”
“I don’t want to give it up entirely,” she said but there was still a sadness in her tone. “Just for this semester or this school year. I just feel like I can’t keep up. There’s so much going on. I’ve had to miss so much and we’re not even a month in.”
“Then we take some other things off your plate,” I said.
“Like what?” she asked sardonically. “Your mother is still doing a lot of the Luna duties, plus planning our solstice ceremony. I haven’t been working with her nearly as much as we had planned. I’d like to do more for Zeff and the magazine. I’m still having to translate Harry’s
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journal and figure out Dad’s books and research. Plus the Waar Pak investigation. Now the rogue attacks.”
–
“You don’t need to worry about the attacks, babe,” I said. “We’ll handle that. And as far as the investigation and this” – I took the journal that was sitting in front of her on the table and tossed it aside — “you can take a break from that. We have plenty of other things to focus on. Besides, if we can stop the Waar Pak now, we don’t need to know what they or Harry were planning.”
“But what he was doing could help us find…”
“It’s not worth you going through this much stress,” I interrupted. “We can handle the investigation and the Waar Pak and the border attacks without you for a while, okay? I’ll keep you updated on everything, but you just let me worry about all of that.”
“That’s too much for you to do on your own, Theo,” she insisted.
“I’m not on my own,” I said. “I have a whole pack behind me. Just like you do. We have a good team, babe. We’ll be okay. Taking care of yourself is more important.”
“But you need me to question anyone who’s under the command,” she pointed out.
“Yeah, and so far, it seems like once it’s broken, we can take it from there,” I stated. She still looked like she was on the verge of tears. “Babe, it’s okay. I swear, it’s perfectly fine for you to focus on school for a while.”
“But then I’ll feel guilty because that’s part of my job,” she said. “I want to help. I want to be a good Luna and take care of my pack. I want to help get to the bottom of all this.”
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“Do you want that more than you want to go to school, then?” I asked.
She hesitated for a minute before shaking her head. “No, I want to be in school.”
“Then you’re staying in.”
“You just don’t get it,” she huffed, turning away and resting her face in
her hands.
I pulled her to me, rubbing her back as I held her.
“Then explain it to me, babe,” I said. “I want to understand.”
She leaned into me. “I just feel overwhelmed, and I don’t know why.”
“Of course you’re feeling overwhelmed, Ayla,” I said. “You’ve taken on so much and so much has been put on you.”
“So?” she replied. “I once worked four jobs withour a car while writing a book. I’ve handled a lot before. I don’t know why I can’t do this.”
“You should never have had to do that in the first place,” I said firmly. “You made it through then because losing your home and your family starving pushed you. There was no other option for you, Ayla. That was our failing back then. Now, you know there are options. You don’t have to go non–stop. We won’t fall apart if you don’t push yourself so hard.”
“But then I feel like I’m failing,” she murmured.
“Then we need to work on getting you past that,” I said. I pushed her up so she could look at me. “I would fall apart if you don’t take care of yourself. I won’t watch you work yourself sick, Ayla. You are still the strongest person I’ve ever known, babe. Now, you need to use that strength to put your health and well–being first. You’re no good to us
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burnt out.”
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“But I feel selfish choosing college. It doesn’t help the pack.”
“So, I wasted my time getting my degree?” I asked wryly.
“You know what I mean,” she huffed. “You weren’t the acting Alpha and you were doing something that built a business that helps support us. I don’t even know what I’m going to study yet.”
“And you won’t figure that out by quitting,” I said. “And I may be taking over early, but that doesn’t mean you have to. You have my mother’s help, and anyone else’s that you need, for as long as you want it. So, for now, no more work on the investigation. You focus on school and the magazine column. If you find the time to work with Mom or plan our ceremony, then go ahead. But that’s it, okay?”
“What about Kingston?” she asked. “You know you both need me there to keep things civil.”
I sighed. “I think we can manage, but if it makes you feel better. You can help until Kingston leaves, but once he’s gone, no more.”
She hesitated, but with effort, she pushed her crestfallen expression away and replaced it with relief.
“Okay.”
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