CLAUDIA

I’ve never been a sound sleeper.

I blame it on all those restless nights from my childhood, back when I was always on alert in case something might happen.

And now the smallest sound wakes me up, like the beep from a notification on my phone.

I ignore the first message because I’m wrapped in Artemis’s arms, who sleeps soundly behind me. I don’t want to move. But I open my eyes to look at my phone on the nightstand when it beeps for a second time, then a third, and a fourth. The alarm clock next to it indicates it’s 3:45 a.m.

Who is texting me at this hour?

I carefully extend my hand and grab my phone. I look at the screen, which is lit up with notifications. It’s Daniel. I scowl as I read his messages.

3:40

Daniel: Claudia, I miss you.

3:41

Daniel: I’m drunk and I can’t stop thinking about you.

Daniel: I did something stupid.

3:42

Daniel: I need to see you, please.

Daniel: Just once.

And it’s the last message that brings my breathing to a complete stop.

3:44

Daniel: I’m in front of your house.

Daniel: I’m not leaving until I see you.

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Artemis squirms behind me. I lower my phone and bury it under a pillow so that the light coming from the screen doesn’t wake him up.

Okay, Claudia. You need to think of the best way to handle this situation. Or it’s going to spiral out of control in too many directions.

I doubt there’s a right way. I entertain the option of not going out to meet him and shutting off my phone, hoping he’ll get tired of waiting. But I know Daniel, and when he’s drunk he tends to fall asleep wherever he happens to be. Besides, I’m not so heartless as to abandon him to Fortune’s mercy when I don’t even know how he got here. What if he drove? There’s no way I can let him leave on his own. Argh! I had a feeling that sleeping with him one last time was a terrible idea. I knew he had feelings for me, and I shouldn’t have taken advantage of him.

I carefully untangle Artemis’s arms from my waist and get out of bed. I steal a brief glance at him lying naked. The moon-light streaming through the window illuminates the muscles of his back. His hand is outstretched, reaching to my side as if he’s searching for me in his sleep.

Artemis Hidalgo.

My iceberg.

I don’t want anything to ruin this, especially not a misunderstanding. I know that if I wake him up to help me with Daniel, he won’t understand and will become jealous, and god knows what he’ll do. Artemis can be very impulsive. He punched his own brother when he found out what happened between us. I can’t begin to imagine what he would to Daniel, even though what we had is in the past. I whisper a curse when I realize that the maid’s uniform is the only thing I have to wear. I quickly tie my hair up in a ponytail, put on my uniform, and quietly exit the room.

I carefully walk down the stairs and hurry to the front door under the cover of darkness. I deactivate the alarm next to the door before I open it and step outside. The night breeze makes me shiver but I don’t let it bother me. And sure enough, Daniel is sitting on the steps of the small staircase at the entrance. He rests his head against a post, and his car is badly parked out front. The door is open. Dear god. How did he manage to get here in one piece?

“Daniel,” I say firmly.

He lifts his head and turns to look at me. I can tell his eyes are red; so are his nose and cheeks. He’s very drunk and has been crying, which makes me feel terrible. It was never my intention to hurt someone like this.

“Hi, baby,” he says with a sad smile.

“What are you doing here? It’s almost four in the morning, Daniel.” I walk down the stairs to face him. He remains seated; I doubt he’s able to stand.

“I needed to see you,” he says softly. “I miss you. Why can’t I get you out of my head?”

“Daniel . . .”

“I’ve never felt this way about anyone before, Claudia. No one. Please give me a chance.”

“Daniel, I was very clear with you right from the start. I—”

“Yes, yes, yes. It was just fucking—no strings attached. I know.

But other girls who’ve said the same thing to me before, they’ve always wanted more. I thought that you wanted more too.”

I shake my head. “It was just sex, Daniel. To me, it was always just that.”

His eyes are watery, and he licks his lips.

“Fuck me, it’s just my luck that I would fall in love with the one girl who actually honors her end of the no strings attached bargain.” He lets out a sarcastic chuckle.

“You can’t do this. You can’t show up at my house like this. It’s not okay. You need to go.”

He stands up and staggers toward me. “I love you, Claudia,” he says with tears in his eyes.

There’s something about that phrase, and those three words that doesn’t sit well with me.

“No. You’re just obsessed with me because you can’t have me, because I haven’t fallen in love with you like all the other girls you’ve been with. You still don’t know what true love is.”

“And you do?”

I remain silent.

“Are you with someone? Who is it? Is he better than me?”

“Daniell. . .”

“Answer me!” he shouts in my face, and I take a step back.

“Daniel, lower your voice.”

“No, tell me who it is.”

“That’s none of your business.”

“So there is someone.”

I don’t want to tell him anything that may hurt him even more, but my patience is wearing thin. He stretches his hand toward my face, and I take one more step back.

“You’re so beautiful.”

“Daniel, I’ll call you a cab. You can’t drive in this state.”

“Are you worried about me?”

I comb through the pockets of my maid’s outfit, searching for my cell phone. And when I can’t find it, alarm bells go off in my head. I’ve left it in the room.

“Daniel, please tell me you didn’t send any more texts after that last one telling me you were in front of my house.”

He scrunches his eyebrows, as if he’s thinking.

“I sent you one more, and called you after, but you didn’t answer.”

Oh god. I hope it didn’t wake Artemis up.

“Daniel, you have to get out of here. Give me your phone, I’ll call you a cab.” He reluctantly gives me his cell and I call a cab that will be here in ten minutes.

I give Daniel his phone back, and quickly look back at the main door of the house, which remains closed. Good. He hasn’t woken up. If he had, he would have been out that door in a hell of a hurry, exploding with rage after seeing those texts. Daniel takes advantage of my distraction to move closer and grab both of my arms. He’s quite strong for someone who’s this drunk. He leans his face forward in an attempt to kiss me, but I turn my head and push him away.

“You haven’t listened to me at all!” I tell him, boiling with anger. “I don’t want anything to do with you. Nothing. Daniel, please go on with your life and leave me alone.”

“Just one kiss good-bye,” he begs me.

I laugh. “No way. You’ve lost your mind.”

The cab arrives and I help him get in.

“I’ll keep the keys to your car. Tomorrow you can come by and get them. This has to be the last time you do something like this, Daniel. Next time, I’ll call the police.”

He nods before closing the door, and I watch the cab pull away and disappear down the road. I make my way back inside the silence and darkness of the house and head upstairs, relieved that that didn’t end up being as bad as I expected.

I open the door to Artemis’s bedroom and the first thing I pick up is the dim light coming from one corner in the room. My heart accelerates when I notice that his bed is empty.

I rest my back against the closed door behind me, and my eyes find Artemis’s eyes. And that’s when I stop breathing. He’s shirtless, has a pair of pajama pants on, and is sitting on a chair next to the window. His hair is messy and the expression on his face is so blank it gives me the chills. I notice he’s holding a tablet in his hands. He turns it around to show me.

There are black-and-white screenshots from the security camera at the front of the house. He’s watched everything. To make things worse, these cameras record without sound. Which means he was only able to watch me talking with Daniel at four o’clock in the morning right after he sent those revealing texts. It’s just a misunderstanding. Just choose your words wisely. My throat tightens when I look into his eyes, while he waits for an explanation. His shoulders and arms are tense, making the outlines of his muscles more pronounced.

“Are you going to tell me what’s going on?” he asks, tossing the tablet on the bed.

“It’s not what it seems.” I hate this clichéd response overused by liars and honest people alike. “He was drunk and I didn’t want him to drive home in that state.”

“Did you fuck him?”

“What does that have to do with—”

“Did you fuck him?” He stands up. “Oh wait, let me read you his last message: ‘I can still remember what it feels like to be inside you.’” The rage that his body language is giving off intensifies.

“My past sex life has nothing to do with you.”

“Yes, it does, when my girlfriend slips out in the middle of the night to meet up with a guy she’s fucked. Have you continued to see him?”

“No, of course not. This happened before you and I started seeing each other.”

“I don’t want you to see him again. And I want you to block him on your phone.”

That makes me raise an eyebrow. “Who are you to tell me what to do?”

“Do you want to keep on seeing him?”

“No. Absolutely not. But I’m the one who decides what to do with the people in my life.”

That makes him angrier. He knows he has no power over me.

I have been and always will be independent.

“Listen to me. I’m sorry. Tonight, I didn’t handle the situation in the best way. But I knew you would be angry, and I wanted to save you the aggravation. I just wanted to send him home in one piece.”

Artemis turns his back to me and runs his hand over his head. And I honestly don’t know what the hell is wrong with me, but seeing him angry and jealous is turning me on. The way his muscles are flexing, the displeasure in his eyes, the tension in his jaw and neck. I want him to use that rage to fuck me with everything he’s got. I shake my head, reacting to my fantasies. Sex with him has clearly done a number on me. He still has his back turned, so I make the first move. I wrap my arms around his waist and rest my cheek on his back. I can hear the beats of his heart and the loud breath he lets out in frustration.

“Do you know how close I was to coming out and beating him to a pulp?” he confesses, confirming what I already knew.

“But I held back. I know how much you hate violence. I thought of you, even after seeing you talking to another man in front of the house. And that’s because I’m madly in love with you.”

I plant a kiss on his back. My hands travel down his firm abdomen and slide inside his pajama pants. Artemis is caught by surprise and tenses.

“I’ve been a bad girl,” I whisper against his back. “Why don’t you fuck me to get rid of your anger?” I move my hand up and down, and he lets out a sigh.

“If you think sex is going to solve this . . .” He turns to face me, and pulls my hands out of his pants. The desire in his eyes gives him away. “You are absolutely right.”

And he kisses me desperately, pressing my body against his with passion. He pushes me backward until my lower back comes in contact with the desk. He picks me up by my thighs and places me on its surface.

He positions himself between my legs, one hand holding me by the waist while the other rips my underwear off. His lips move aggressively, almost with rage, against mine. And I’m enjoying it. I enjoy everything about this man. We kiss each other madly.

I slide my fingers to the waistband of his pajama pants and drag them down in one swift pull. I let out a moan when I feel his erection graze my inner thigh, and he’s barely started. He stops kissing me and his eyes search mine.

“I love you,” he tells me, and kisses me. And before I have the chance to say a word, he enters me in one single thrust.

And right here, against this desk, we make up over a round of angry sex that brings out our wildest and most wicked urges.

And though I have not given him my answer with words, I finally have one. Yes, I do know what love is. And it has been by my side, all my life.

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