"I'm super super tough! Watch me, Tana! Watch me!" Alec squealed, pouncing onto a ball as if it were his opponent.

"I'm gonna protect you forever! I'll be your personal bodyguard!" Alec said, puffing his small chest out and making Tana giggle loudly.

"And you're gonna be my friend forever too?" She asked. Alec nodded vigorously.

"I'm your big brother. I have to be your friend forever," he said, sending them both into a fit of giggles.

Tana jolted awake with a killer headache and a heart full of grief. She was somewhere soft, which didn't make sense.

She stumbled up to her feet. There were no restraints, which was odd. And it didn't smell of blood. It smelled of Declan.

She peered around the room, looking for anything she could use as a weapon. She wasn't sure if this was some kind of cruel joke or not but she couldn't be caught unawares. However, all she could find was a phone, which wasn't much use to her.

Suddenly the door opened and she nearly jumped out of her skin, frantically searching for something more dangerous than the phone. When she couldn't, she decided to just hurl the phone at the intruder and duck beside the bed.

"Ow! What the hell?" Declan's voice filled her ears and instantly calmed her, which made her pop her head out over the bed to look at him and watch as he bent down to pick up his phone. He had a few deep slashes on his arms that were healing much slower than others and a black bruise on his cheek.

"Why are you here? What's going on?" She asked, keeping herself crouched on the floor as he came closer to her.

"You're safe, Tana. Talon is locked up along with a few other of his wolves in the cells. You're at our house. You're safe," he said, crouching down in front of her.

"And Tuk? Is he ok?"

Declan nodded. "Tuk and your friend, Devon, got a bit banged up but they're ok. They're at the pack house. We can go see them when you're ready," he said quietly.

She didn't know what to say to him. Should she have apologized? Or said thanks?

So, she didn't say anything. Instead, she lurched forward and wrapped her arms around his neck while she let the sobs she had held back free.

She couldn't save Alec. She had left him behind.

She couldn't even save herself. Declan had had to do it.

She was weak. So, so weak.

"I let him die," she whispered against his neck. Declan tensed in her embrace but let out a sigh.

"No you didn't. It wasn't your fault, Tana. It was Talon's fault. There was nothing you could have done," Declan replied softly. She pulled away from him and wiped her eyes.

"There was no silver involved. I could have gotten away from Talon somehow. I wasn't strong enough. He only had my wrists. I could have done something," she said, running a hand through her tangled hair.

"You can't blame yourself for this. There was nothing you could have done," he told her. Although she didn't believe him, she nodded anyway.

"What about the Blood Wolves? What happened to them?" She asked.

"About three quarters of them died. Some of Lennox and I's omegas are currently cleaning up the bodies. The other quarter followed Fang and his warriors back to Fang's pack. The problem is that no one knows where his pack is located or how big it is. So until our warriors are healed and ready to fight again we're waiting. Plus, Fang and his pack are just as banged up as we are. There's nothing to worry about now," he informed her. Well, there was something to worry about, but she wouldn't bring it up to him yet.

She'd have to ask Devon how sure he was about the rumours about Declan.

As she began to calm down, her stomach started acting up. She felt a familiar bout of nausea coming on and quickly pushed herself to her feet, racing to the bathroom without another word. Once there, she spilled her guts into the toilet bowl and groaned in discomfort.

"Shit! Are you okay? Are you sick? Did you ingest poison?" Declan asked frantically, hanging in the doorway while she was crouched over the toilet bowl.

"No. My stomach hasn't been right for a few days. It's probably just a stomach bug or something. Calm down," Tana huffed, retching once again. Declan seemed to be pondering something, narrowing his eyes as he thought about goddess-knows-what.

She got up to rinse her mouth and wash her hands and found Declan still very deep in thought.

"What are you thinking so hard about?" She asked, effectively dragging him out of his daze. He shook his head and gave her a sheepish smile.

"Nothing. Just trying to remember something," he replied. "I have to go check on Jade. She got really badly hurt. Will you be okay by yourself for a little while?" He asked. A bit confused and somewhat hurt, Tana gave him a slow nod. He offered her a weak smile and practically dashed from the room like he couldn't wait to get away from her.

And as she watched him go, she wondered why he had wanted her back in the first place.

***

She sat in that room for hours. Declan didn't come back even when the sun set. She realized then that she was just as alone as she had been with Talon.

She wasn't upset. She was pissed off. She had waited years and years to see the look on Talon's face when she finally bested him. For the day that she was a step ahead, not him.

Declan had taken that all away from her and he couldn't even stand to look her in the eye.

"Looks like you've got a lot on your mind, doll," Bea's light accent drifted towards her, snapping her attention to the balcony, where Bea stood with a sympathetic smile on her face.

"I thought being home would finally get a smile on your face. Where's that mate of yours?" She asked, sitting down on the edge of the bed beside Tana. Tana just let out a breath and shook her head.

"I don't know where home is. I don't think I have one. Declan said he was checking on his sister but I think he just wanted to get away from me," she replied. Bea reminded Tana of Lumina quite a bit. She had the same comforting aura surrounding her that made Tana just let her walls down in an instant. Perhaps Lumina had meant even more to Tana than she had originally thought.

"See, I did what I did because I thought it was what you wanted. Lumina always told me to look out for her pups. In a way, you were hers more than you were your mother's. But I think that what you want isn't here," Bea said softly, causing Tana to turn and look at her.

"I don't know what I want anymore. I keep getting lied to and things keep getting taken away from me. I'm so sick of it. I just want the truth. Not the rumours or the lies just the straight facts. And no one can seem to give that to me," she replied. Bea let out a small chuckle at that.

"Every man I've met has been rotten at the core. I thought your Declan was different. Adopting a pup that wasn't his, being so kind to such a tortured soul. He strayed so far from how his father led. It was refreshing. But I suppose anything can happen behind closed doors. Have you told him about the pregnancy or has he figured it out on his own?"

Tana froze. And when Bea saw her, so did she.

"Oh, god, I thought you knew. I thought wolves could just- I'm so sorry," Bea gasped, a hand over her mouth. Tana could feel her head reeling.

Pregnant. She couldn't be pregnant. She raked her hands through her hair, her heart pounding against her ribcage harder and harder.

"It's ok, you know? You have a mate and so many people who can help you," Bea said, but Tana couldn't calm the rapid beating of her heart.

"You need to get me out of here," she said. Bea furrowed her eyebrows in confusion.

"You need to get me out of here and hide me. I- I can't do this. Declan keeps hiding things from me and I need out. I need to leave," Tana sputtered, gazing at Bea with wide, desperate eyes.

Bea frowned and let out a small sigh.

"If that is what you need, I will help you. But you must be sure that this is what you want," Bea said.

Tana looked at the ground. Her heart ached for Declan, but both she and her wolf knew that he wasn't being honest with her. That she couldn't trust him.

He didn't want her back. He had left as fast as possible. He was her mate and he didn't want her.

"It is."

Bea nodded slowly. "Give me tomorrow to get things ready. Meet me at the edge of the woods tomorrow night as soon as Declan falls asleep. Make sure no one follows you. Bring as little as possible, ok?" She said. Tana exhaled a deep breath and nodded.

"Thank you," she said quietly. Bea offered a weak smile.

"I was once just like you. I know how it feels to feel lost, darling. But promise me that this is what will make you happy," Bea said as she began walking to the balcony once again.

"It is. I know it is," Tana said. Bea didn't respond, just chuckled and turned to the door again.

"Women like you have always left me in awe, Tana Ingrid."

And then she was gone.

***

The next day she still didn't see Declan. There were four guards outside the door of the house and none of them told her where he was or when he would be back. However, she managed to convince them to let Tuk and Devon come visit her.

"Tana, you know those things I said- I don't know if they're true," Devon started, but Tana just shook her head.

"I know. But there's been a lot he's been hiding. He took my revenge away from me. He brought me here and left without an explanation. I can't take the lies anymore. I don't belong here. Not yet, anyway. I need time to figure out who I am. By myself," she said. Tuk looked like he was on the verge of tears. Devon just sighed and turned away.

"I want to come with you," Tuk said.

"You can't. I need to do this alone. But I promise I'll mind link you as soon as I settle down, ok? The only link I'm smothering is the one with Declan, so that he can't find me," she said.

"What about Sincere? And me? You're the only one I have left, Tana," Tuk said, pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes.

"Sincere will be fine. She'll forget about me eventually. She's still really young. And I promise I'll talk to you every day. You can even come visit if you can get away without being seen," Tana told him.

He nodded slowly. He didn't seem appeased, but he didn't say anything else.

"I promise I'll come back, Tuk. I promise."

He weakly smiled at her. Tuk had never been the best at goodbyes.

"Declan has been at the packhouse. He's locked himself up with Markus and Blake in his office. No one knows what they're talking about. I think his dad is there too," Tuk told her. "You should be able to get out tonight without trouble," he added.

“You know I love you, right?”

Tuk just sighed and smiled tautly.

“Yeah. I know. You’d better get packed up, though,” he said, leaning forward and pulling her against him. They stayed like that for a while. The two of them had never been big huggers, but they hugged when it counted.

“Take care of yourself,” he whispered into her hair. She smiled and nodded. Sᴇaʀ*ᴄh the FɪndNovᴇl.nᴇt website on Gøøglᴇ to access chapters of novels early and in the highest quality.

She could do that.

***

Declan, unsurprisingly, didn’t show up that night, so Tana figured she could just head out. Whenever he decided to return he would find his mate missing. Perhaps he wouldn’t care at all.

Just as she moved towards the back door, the one door that wasn’t guarded, a tiny meow caught her off guard. Sitting a few paces away was Sam, the tiny kitten Declan had given to her.

“You want to come with me?”

Another meow.

“Fine. But be quiet,” she whispered, scooping up the kitten without another thought. The cat started purring right away.

She had a backpack full of her things. Mostly the things that had been in her bag when she arrived, but also a few clothes and other things she figured she would need.

She quickly slipped out of the door and hurried towards the meadow. She could just make out Bea’s figure at the edge of the woods, waiting for Tana to arrive.

Tana didn’t want to leave Declan. He was her mate. Her other half. But he wasn’t leaving her with much of a choice. He left her when she needed him most.

“You sure you want to go through with this?” Bea asked softly, her eyes fixed on Tana.

“I’m sure,” she replied. Bra nodded and handed her a vial or clear liquid. It wasn’t much, but it smelled quite strong even with the cap on.

“Take this for now. You’ll have to take it once a week, but it’s going to block the bond with Declan. You’ll still be mates but he won’t be able to track you down. Now, let’s get going. Ready?”

Tana took a deep breath and downed the liquid. She turned around and took one last look at the pack house. It was quiet. Peaceful. As if the battle had never happened. As if she had never happened.

“I’m ready.”

End of Part 1

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