Waves
Chapter 7 Big Cats and Bigger Feelings

I have been many things in my life, played many roles; the son, the friend, the brother, the clarinet player in the band, the gamer, and I hate to say it, the chicken. One thing I have never been, though, is powerful or even close to anything resembling power. Not that I was ever picked on or bullied, I wasn’t, but it wasn’t because anyone feared me, it was simply because I was invisible. Who would bully someone who wasn’t even there? That was my life, but it was all different now. I have a power surging through me that I didn’t fully understand or know how to control. I have an important assignment ahead of me, I have never been important before. I have evil people out to get me and I feel that my new twelve year old friend is closer to me than any friend I had ever had, even though I have known him only a couple of hours.

This power was scaring me a little and exhilarating me a lot, as long as I held this three ball anyway. As I sat there, staring out, I felt that I could catch that tree on fire with my mind if I wanted to, I think. And that was my entire problem, I really didn’t know what I had or what to do with it. Do I want the tree to catch fire? Of course not, but something was bubbling and exploding inside of me and it needed to come out.

I could easily see why the bad guys wanted this but as the green hat guy told me, I have more power with this than they would. So if you think about it, if they are willing to go to these great heights to steal this from me, this thing that is only partially powerful to them, just think what I could do with it. A frightening thought, and a confidence building thought. Maybe if the bad guys approached me again, I could just zap them, or teleport them someplace else, or, I don’t know. I don’t know! I don’t know! I am sick and tired of not knowing. Well, knowing or not, it was time to re-engage.

“I’m starving,” I said to Derek.

“Yea, I’m pretty hungry too. Have you eaten anything today?”

“I don’t know, maybe this morning. I don’t remember this morning.”

“Hey,” Derek said excitedly as a new idea popped into his head, “my mom works around here. She sells real estate so she might be out at a property but if she’s in her office, maybe we can get some money for something to eat.”

Now normally I would say no to an offer like this, my dad always taught me not to borrow but I was growing weak with hunger.

“Well, sure, if you don’t mind,” I answered.

“Let’s go,” then Derek stopped, “or are you supposed to do something here, at the cove?”

“You know Derek, I don’t know what I am supposed to do. Let’s go eat.”

We got up and started walking across the grass, still wet but not dripping. We walked past a wedding party. It didn’t look like any wedding was happening in this area anytime soon. I suspect that they were doing some pre-wedding pictures. The bride was wearing her full wedding gown amidst a few giggly bridesmaids. There were several young men wearing tuxedos, I’m sure one of them was the groom but I didn’t know which one, they were just hanging out, waiting for the photographer to set the stage. It was a beautiful spot for sure. I thought about asking them if they wanted a beat-up, soaking wet, disheveled slob in their picture, with a billiard ball of course. I’m sure they would have agreed had I been carrying a nine ball, the yellow would have matched the bridesmaids’ gowns.

Across the grassy area was another sidewalk. To the right and a little bit down was a narrow uphill passageway which I guess was technically a street, although unlike any street back home. It was barely wide enough for one car going in one direction, sort of an alley I suppose or just a walking street. We walked up to an intersection, then this alley was reduced to ascending stairs, which we climbed. It fed into the shopping area and was probably the street that Derek had walked down with his knapsack. At the top end of this narrow stairway street we encountered a glorious, intoxicating aroma - hamburgers! I just stood there and soaked in the smell. Derek smiled at me.

“Yea, Smash Burger is pretty good isn’t it,” he said, through his smiles.

“I know. I am dying here.”

“They have these in Kansas?” Derek asked, with a certain amount of surprise in his voice.

I think he had the wrong impression of Kansas, as if we hadn’t discovered electricity yet.

“Yes! Not in Salina but in Manhattan.”

“Manhattan?”

“Not that Manhattan. Manhattan Kansas.”

Across the street from this enchanting perfume of beef and grease was an upscale real estate office. Derek confidently entered. I was embarrassed about my appearance but driven by hunger, I reluctantly tagged along. He walked over to his mom’s desk. She was very professionally dressed and had a perfect medium length hairstyle. Derek resembled her, they had the same eyes. She was looking at her computer screen, and didn’t notice him at first, but then she did and seemed very pleased to see him.

“Hi honey, you’re all wet, are you okay?” she said sweetly and motherly.

I was back a few steps, partly out of shyness and partly because we were about to beg for food, an awkward position for me to be sure. She didn’t see me until Derek introduced us.

“Oh I’m fine. This is my friend Paxton.”

She looked at me then took a faint but noticeable gasp. I could tell she was trying to cover for her eyes bugging out. There was something about me that was shocking to her. Now I am not the handsomest guy in the world and I was wet and banged up, but her reaction seemed focused on something else, something beyond my mere shabbiness.

“Nice to meet you Paxton,” still trying to cover for something, “Do you live around here?”

Before I had a chance to answer, I noticed several kittens on her desk. I’m sure they weren’t there a moment ago. And as I became more aware of my peripheral vision, I saw many more cats. By now, I was used to these apparitions so I didn’t further embarrass myself be looking around at things that no one else could see. I saw them without really looking, if you know what I mean. The cats varied in age, and were all very peaceful, some were even purring. I felt relaxed and comforted surrounded by these felines.

And I just realized something else, I didn’t know Derek’s last name. Here we were going through life changing peril together and we didn’t even know each others’ last names. I wanted to say ‘nice to meet you too Mrs. this or Mrs. that’, the way my mom taught me but alas, I used a more generic approach.

“Nice to meet you too,” I said, as she continued to stare at me, in an examination sort of way. “No ma’am, I live in Kansas.”

That seemed to give her another jolt, although she hid it well. Then I saw her eyes well up in tears. She quickly turned, grabbed a tissue and pretended to blow her nose but in reality was wiping her eyes. Derek didn’t notice any of this. I think there is something we are all guilty of, and that is failing to see our parents as real people. I could see the tears and hear the quiver in her voice better than Derek. To him she was just mom. I am positive I would have the same blindness with my own mom.

“So Paxton,” her voice still a bit shaky, “are you visiting someone?”

This was a question that I didn’t anticipate.

“Yea, uh, a family friend, Mr. Finnegan,” I answered.

She didn’t bat an eye at that name, and why should she? She also didn’t seem to notice the billiard ball, she just kept dissecting my face.

“Mom,” Derek said, getting to the point, “do you think you could… see Paxton hasn’t eaten anything and…”

His mom sprung to action.

“Of course!” she said as she spun to grab her purse.

“We’re just going to Smash Burger, I won’t spoil my appetite,” he said to her.

“That sounds fun, you go right ahead and spoil it,” she responded, much to Derek’s astonishment, if I read his expression correctly.

Then she took out a twenty and oddly enough, handed it to me, not her son.

“Thank you so much! I’ll pay you back when…”

“Heavens no!” she interrupted while tearing again, “take this, please.”

It was like she wanted to say more but was afraid her voice wouldn’t hold up.

“Thanks mom,” Derek said as he walked toward the door. I turned and followed him.

“Good by,” was her final word.

“Bye,” I responded while turning toward her one last time.

Then we walked out the door. I had no idea what that was all about and out of curiosity, I looked back one last time and saw her through the window. She sat down, stared then dropped her head and started sobbing. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t tell Derek what I saw, I don’t know why, it just didn’t seem right.

Then I became aware of my surroundings, there were big cats all around, lions, leopards, tigers, cheetahs, probably ten or fifteen of these ferocious big cats. At this moment, however, they weren’t ferocious at all. They seemed to be in protection mode or more to the point, comforting mode. They weren’t scary in the least. They were majestic, powerful yet oddly wise. I stood there for a moment, soaking in the experience. Derek finally called to me.

“Come on!”

As much as I loved these cats, I was about to die of hunger. We went into the burger joint and ordered. I paid and offered Derek the change but he insisted I keep it. Seldom have I been this hungry in life. I am a very scheduled guy, I always have been. Today had thrown me way off my mojo. But because of it, I enjoyed and appreciated that food more than any I could remember,

That burger, fries and a Coke sat in front me. I smiled at first and just looked at it. It’s like opening a Christmas present, the best part of it is right before you open it. The anticipation floats there, I love it. But then I dug in. Every bite was a delight, the meat, the sauce, the bread, it was the best meal I ever had. But as my hunger started to be satisfied, I thought of those cats and of Derek’s mom. What was happening there? I should know, I should get it, but I didn’t.

I also thought about my task, it had to happen soon. Maybe my task had to do with his mom, although it didn’t feel quite right. I also thought about Derek, my new courageous young friend sitting across from me. I had put him in too much danger. It wasn’t right. I made up my mind, as we chowed down, I was going to finish this business alone, whatever it was. Derek needed to go home. I knew he wouldn’t want to go but I had to tell him. We finished our food and sat for a short spell, letting our feast digest. I changed my posture, and Derek recognized it. It signaled that it was time to move on.

“Derek,” I said confidently, “you have to go home.”

He didn’t fight it like I thought he would.

“I thought you were going to say that.”

“Really?”

“Yea. I don’t want to go but I know you have this thing to do.”

We both smiled and chuckled and said at essentially the same time.

“Whatever it is.”

Saying this together made us laugh even more. Then our laughter morphed into a serious moment. This is the time that, if we were girls, we would have hugged and cried. But you know, we’re guys, so we did the guy hug thing, which is just a somber moment and a serious yet reassuring look. We finally exchanged last names.

“I’ll never forget what you did for me,” I said to him.

“Me neither,” Derek said, and I think he was fighting back tears.

I’m sure he didn’t want me to see that. He quickly slurped from his straw, even though his drink was empty, just a distraction. I got him, in a way that I seldom got people. It was nice, I was really going to miss him.

We walked outside without saying much.

“Thanks for the lunch or dinner, whatever it was,” I said while smiling.

“See ya,” Derek said while turning to walk away. Then he stopped and turned back. “Maybe I could…”

“No,” I interrupted, “I’ll be fine, and so will you.”

Derek slowly walked away as I just stood and watched. It reminded me of watching the hang gliders, especially the red and white one. It sailed smoothly with a steady course, then eventually dropped out of sight. This was much the same. I watched Derek, my new friend, walk through the crowd of shoppers and tourists, crossing the street while getting smaller and smaller, around a corner, then poof, he was gone. I was alone. I didn’t know what to do or where to go, but it was right.

I looked back toward the real estate office where Derek’s mom worked. All of the big cats were gone, except one. There was a full-grown male lion, with a gorgeous thick mane, lying near the front door, guarding. I smiled, then looked away. I crossed the street and started walking, or more accurately, meandering. I had no place to go, that I knew of anyway, so I strolled.

I walked past a clothing store, a soap store and an art gallery. People filled the sidewalk; talking, laughing, wondering, kissing and everything in between. I just kept walking, without a purpose. I passed a restaurant or two, turned a corner, maybe more. I was lost. Eventually I sat on a bench, I just had to close my eyes. It felt wonderful to rest, my clothes were mostly dry, my stomach was full and my eyes peacefully settled into a dark place. I probably sat there for five minutes I guess.

Then someone sat down next to me. I didn’t hear them sit down, I didn’t feel or smell them either. I just knew that someone was there. And I also knew who it was. Beyond a shadow of a doubt, with every fiber of my being I knew who it was. So with my eyes still closed, I spoke.

“I’m ready.”

“I know,” Finnegan answered.

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