Morningstar
Chapter XXXIV: Unshattered Hearts

Icarus is taking the long route towards his dormitory. The sun is already hiding, which means that curfew is soon going to start. He spots Fey, Beta, Moneo, and Kobo by the lake. They are all happy or with smiles on their face. They are the happiest group in Icarus’s team. He remembers when he once used to laugh like that with Quin.

Kobo is the first to spot Icarus, but Moneo is the first to wave. Then the rest wave. It takes Icarus a second to understand that they are waving at him. He does an awkward half wave at them before continuing his path.

Then, he spots whom he wanted to spot. Phoenix, along with Zanna and Rin, are walking in the opposite direction from him. “Zanna, Rin,” he says as he nods, acknowledging them. “Could you give me a second with Phoenix?”

“Of course,” Rin says as she walks away with Zanna.

“What?” Phoenix asks. She is keeping her distance in public, even though this morning she kissed him in public.

“Could you… come and sleep with me tonight?” he asks. “Tomorrow, you will have to sleep in your room because the trial is the next day, and it is part of the rules.” She stares at him without answer. “Please. I just want to hold you and know that you are not going to leave.”

“I’ll think about it,” she says and winks. She walks away to follow Zanna and Rin.

Icarus continues his path, heading to his dormitory. He takes his time, knowing that Phoenix would not be there for a while. When he arrives, he heads to his room. As he opens the door, he hears a door behind him open.

“Hello, neighbor,” Demetrio’s voice comes from behind him.

“What?” Icarus asks as he turns. His conversations with Demetrio are never fun.

“Just wanted to talk,” Demetrio answers, leaning against the doorframe. He is wearing his red armor without the helmet. He must have just arrived. “I heard something funny. I heard that this kid got his arm blown off and you worked with Quin to try to save him.”

“You would’ve done the same,” Icarus says.

“I would have,” Demetrio answers, “but that’s not the funny thing. Bad tongues are saying that one of your students had something to do with it.”

“You should not believe everything that you hear.”

“And that you challenged Morning,” Demetrio continues as if he didn’t hear Icarus. “It takes a lot of courage to stand up to your lord. Well, maybe not a lot of courage. Only fools would do that.”

“He is not my lord,” is the only thing that Icarus says.

“Uh, wait until he hears that.”

“I told him already,” Icarus says. “I have other people that I… prefer.”

“Oh, right, your lord is Night.” Demetrio scratches his bearded chin. “I heard that you worked for him for many years. How was it?”

“You tell me,” Icarus says. “You worked for Midnight.”

Demetrio smiles. He should know by now that Icarus does his research. Icarus knows about everyone that he has to work with. He knows about every student and every mentor at Morningstar. “I should have guessed that you knew.”

“I know everything,” Icarus says. “I know that you were the bodyguard of Midnight. You got that scar on your eye on your third trial by a dagger. You thought that you were going to be blind in that eye, but luckily the blade did not touch it. You had six sweethearts during your time at Moonblind, which were, in order, Vanya, Lia, Taryn, Wisk, Doe, and Rebbie. The last one broke your heart and since then you have never been able to be serious with another woman.”

“Shut up,” Demetrio says. “You do not have any right to speak about that! You don’t have any right to psychoanalyze me!”

“Just like you do not have a right to question me about rumors,” Icarus answers. Demetrio heads back inside his room and slams the door. Icarus shrugs. He doesn’t care that he made him mad. Demetrio has been searching from the first day a way to make Icarus mad, and Icarus has not let him.

Icarus opens the door to his room. He quickly closes it behind him when he spots Phoenix. She is lying on his bed, above the sheets. She is looking up at the ceiling. She must have climbed again through the window. “Took you a while,” she says.

“Demetrio caught me outside,” he answers as he takes his ripped cloak off.

“Ah, that’s why I heard someone slamming a door.” She turns to the side. “Give the cloak. I am cold.”

“You have the sheets under you,” Icarus answers.

“It is not the same.” Icarus nods and walks towards her. She sits up as he hands her the cloak. She places it on as he sits down beside her. She sniffs at the cloak before looking at it. “It is broken.”

“Yeah,” he admits. He takes his mask off. “I ripped it today to tied something around Jas’s arm.”

“Right,” she says. “To be honest, you were awesome today.” This causes Icarus to smile. He doesn’t give much thought when someone gives him compliments, but when it comes from Phoenix, he cannot help but feel special. “You worked with Quin without letting your past get you.”

“It was a split decision,” he says. “It was either to save a life or to not work with Quin.”

“And you acted so fast. I didn’t know that you were a healer.”

“I am not,” Icarus says. “There are just some things that I was forced to learn.”

“Forced?” Her curious kid-like eyes look at Icarus.

Icarus’s grin become bigger. He pulls her close and hugs her. He just wants to hold her for a while. “Hopefully, you won’t have to go through that.” He kisses her head, but she pushes him away.

“I haven’t showered,” she says.

“You can use my shower,” he says. “You can borrow my sleeping clothes. They will be a little big, but it is just for sleeping.”

“I brought mine,” she says as she points at the table. He rises an eyebrow. “What? I was planning on going to shower after I talked to you for a while.”

“Or were you planning on asking me to use my shower?” Icarus asks. Students do not have personal showers. They have public showers.

“Don’t blame me,” she says. “If you had the opportunity, you would use it too.”

He chuckles. “Well, you can use my shower whenever you want.”

She stands up and takes the clothes from the table. She begins to make her way to the bathroom but stops by the door. “Icarus?” Icarus looks at her. “Do you remember the story that you told me about the duke, his gala, and the man that killed him?” He nods. “You were the man, weren’t you?” He nods again, this time slower. “And… was the woman that accompanied you Quin?”

His sight moves to the ground. He remembers that night clearly. He was doing a job for Night. He had to play a character in order to get to his target. He was smiling at the woman, dancing with her and touching her on places that no ordinary man should touch. He was faking it all.

“Yes.”

***

Killam is at Wraith. He is holding a cup filled with rum. Whenever no one is looking, he throws its content away. He is not here for drinking nor for partying. Usually, the best kind of information comes from places underground and from people who cannot hold their tongue. And Killam knows that when someone is drunk, the least thing that they worry about is what they are saying.

He spots Rin, who is drunk enough to approach him. She is with another man. He is tall with brown hair. Killam thinks that he is good looking, but not enough to be hot. “Look who it is, the asshole of Draconic!” she says.

“I think that you should reconsider who the asshole is,” Killam says. “I am not the one calling people names.” Sᴇaʀ*ᴄh the (ꜰind)ɴʘvel.nᴇt website on Gøøglᴇ to access chapters of novels early and in the highest quality.

“Not now anyway,” Rin says. “What are you doing here? Are you looking for a woman to go away with?”

Killam shrugs. “No, but if it happens, then it happens.” He points at the man standing next to her. “Who is he? Another victim?”

Her sullen eyes glare at him. “If he were another victim, something would have happened already.”

“Ah, and here I thought that I had a chance,” the man says. He flashes a smile towards Killam as he extends his hand. “I am Padden.”

“From Angelic,” Killam says, remembering that he heard that name before. He is part of Quin’s team, which are named Angelic. “I won’t bother shaking your hand. Then you would think that we are friends and you will expect me to show mercy if we face at the battlefield.”

“You are a mood killer,” Rin says.

“I am not here for partying, Rin,” Killam answers.

“Then what are you here for?”

Killam glares at her. Does she really want to know? “Information.”

“Ah,” she said as if that word was enough. She turns around and returns her sight again. “You see the man without a shirt?” Killam nods when he finds him. “Close to him and near the wall there is a man with glasses. He has had many drinks already and is taking a break. Get him to drink. He knows a lot and his tongue gets a little loose at times.” She returns to the dance floor without adding another word.

Killam moves through the crowd. He approaches the bar and steals a new drink from under a drunk person’s nose. He makes his way towards the man with the glasses. As he approaches, the man doesn’t bother to rise his brown eyes. He looks sleepy.

“You look as if you need a drink,” Killam says as he offers the cup.

The man looks up, but not at Killam’s face. “I really shouldn’t.”

“Come on,” Killam says. “You won’t be able to drink tomorrow since it is the day before the trial, and we do not know what might happen at the trial. Better live your life today.”

He takes the cup, drinks, and looks at Killam. His bug-eyes remain at him. “You are… really good looking.” He then shakes his head. “Sorry. It is the booze talking.”

“I don’t mind,” Killam answers. The man thinks that he is cute. He could use that to his advantage. “I could say the same thing about you, but I haven’t drink enough to let my tongue run.” The man smiles. “I am Killam.”

“Ben,” he answers.

“Ben… I like it,” Killam lies. He doesn’t care about the name. “Tell me, Ben, do you come here often?”

He shakes his head. His brown curls move with him. “No. My friends forced me.”

Killam looks around, even though he is not paying attention to his surroundings. “I don’t see them.”

“Some are dancing, some are making out in a corner,” he says, “and some got lucky. You know what happens whenever someone sense that their life is in peril. Their blood begins to rush, and fear disappears. They end up losing the nerve and asking anyone to hook up. And everyone is crazy enough to accept.”

“Aren’t you like them?” Killam asks. “Aren’t you looking too?”

“What? Are you offering?” Ben asks. Then his eyes move away from Killam. “I am sorry. I am not thinking straight.”

“Too bad,” Killam says as he shrugs. “I was indeed offering. I think that you are cute, and we might not know what will happen at the trial. We do not know if we will have to face each other. Might as well have some fun before then.”

“I doubt that we will face each other,” Ben says. “I’m from Dwarfish and we are facing Fantastic at the trial. If you are from Fantastic, then we will have to fight each other.”

“I am from Draconic,” Killam says.

“Ah, the assassin’s team. No. You will be facing Prophetic.” He looks up. “I… I’ll take you on your offer…”

Killam stares at Ben. He has already pulled the information that he needed out of him. He doesn’t need to keep talking with him, even less fuck him. He now knows that he will be facing Prophetic. But he wouldn’t mind screwing around just enough to please himself.

He grins at Ben. “Let’s do it then.”

Ben smiles for a second before trying to hide it. “My room is free.”

“Lead the way.”

Ben nods and heads towards the door. Killam throws away his cup and follows him. Ben walks quickly, lowering his pace a couple of times to see if Killam is following him. When they reach one of the boys’ dormitory, he climbs the stairs. Then he stops by a door that must be his room.

“Here we are,” Ben says.

“All right–” Ben turns around and pushes himself against Killam. He is smaller than Killam so when Ben pulls him to kiss him, he has to lower his back. He kisses Killam consecutively. He is eager, Killam can feel it. But Killam is not someone that likes to be led.

He grabs Ben and lifts him as he pushes him against the wall. He holds him against the wall as Ben circles his legs around him. He hears him moan against his lips. How eager is this man?

“Come,” Ben whispers and then detaches from Killam. “Let’s continue this inside.”

As Killam moves to follow, he spots someone. Agrion is standing by another door a couple of doors away. He is staring at Killam. His expression doesn’t show anything. Killam turns to Ben. “I have to leave.”

“W-what?” Ben asks.

“Don’t worry,” he says. “Survive the trial and I promise that you will have me for one night.” Killam doesn’t wait for his response. He walks towards Agrion who is still staring at him. “Hello, cutie pie. Do you like the view?”

“I didn’t know that you are gay,” Agrion answers.

“I don’t do titles,” he says.

“Titles?”

“I don’t believe in that shit of gay and straight. I like whoever I like. There is no reason to label me for that.”

“Then fine, I did not know that you liked men,” Agrion says.

“Really?” Killam asks. “Why do you think I call you cutie pie?”

“To mock me.”

Killam moves his head around, almost agreeing. “That too.” He looks back to where he left Ben. He is not there anymore. “You still owe me something. What did you see yesterday?”

“I saw you leave Jas’s room,” Agrion says. He looks around to see if someone is hearing. “I am sure that you had something to do with Jas’s incident.”

Killam leans in and places his hand on the wall. He is covering Agrion. “And what is going to cost me for your silence?”

Agrion moves his eyes away from Killam. Killam guesses that he is not accustomed to having someone so close, but Killam cannot help it. He cannot help being close to Agrion. He cannot help smelling the coconut scent coming from him.

“I won’t talk,” Agrion says, still not looking at him. “If I talk, Morning will probably kill most of our team.”

“Is that it?” Killam asks. “Aren’t you going to take advantage of this opportunity?”

“No.”

“Then let me at least pay you something,” Killam says. He leans in and kisses Agrion on the lips. He can feel the stiffness in Agrion’s lips. He can feel how Agrion slowly gives in to Killam. When Killam pulls back, he sees Agrion’s fingers touch his lips as if he cannot believe someone touched them. “First time being kissed, huh?” It takes Agrion a second, but he nods. “I am sure that it won’t be the last time.” He winks at Agrion and walks away, still feeling the taste of Agrion in his mouth.

***

Agrion watches Killam walking away. He thought that Killam was scary. He thought that Killam was heartless. But his lips and the way that he kisses Agrion tells him otherwise. He lowers his fingers from his lips. Killam is right. Agrion has never been kissed. Hakea refused to kiss him. He even refused from touching any part of him but his hips and his bottom.

He slowly sits on the floor. He feels his mouth beginning to curve. He liked it. He liked Killam’s lips on him. He liked feeling wanted by someone. He looks back to where Killam left as he realizes something.

Agrion knows that this is the beginning of forgetting his feelings for Hakea.

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